Cynicism, suspicion, doubt and mistrust are some of the things that we juggle with week to week. Locked away in our treasure chest of life experiences are the testimonies of life that we’ve accumulated along the way. Love is the strongest emotion we have here on earth….but unfortunately, it too can be used as a weapon against us. Therefore, it’s quite easy for people to feel, after awhile, a little battle-scarred and suspicious about some subjects, occupations and people.

It’s simple to understand that in one hand, we hold all of the beautiful and successful experiences that have happened to us…..in the other hand we hold the mistakes, hurt, and pain that have accumulated over the years. Each time we are confronted with a new person, place or thing, we wonder which hand it will end up in. Learning is essential to avoid future pitfalls…for if we make the same mistake over and over again, what have we learned?

I would like to share a little story with you that I was privy to a few years ago. Mark and Sal together owned a glass company. One day Mark discovered that Sal had been slowly siphoning money out of their business bank account and spending it on himself at will. Mark was devastated, to say the least….he could not believe that his trusted friend would do this to him and their business. Mark confronted Sal and said, “Sal, why did you do this to me? What did I ever do to you to warrant this behavior?” Sal’s reply was chilling….”There’s a sucker born every day.” This is a true story. Sal had no problem doing what he did. To him, Mark was just one more sucker to take advantage of. The friendship, you ask? Well, that went out the window. Mark decided to buy out Sal’s part of the business and today, Mark has one of the most successful glass businesses in New York City. What happened to Sal? He just declared bankruptcy for the second time!! Mark shared with me his thoughts on this fiasco just a few months ago. He said, “Jennifer, for me, a partnership doesn’t work. You think you know the person you’re in business with, and then after ten years you discover they’re a cockroach.” The point is, through experience, Mark has built up a cynicism to being involved with anybody else through ownership. I said to Mark, “It could have been just one bad apple.” Mark replied, “Tell that to my bank account that is a quarter of a million dollars lighter.” We all have had bad experiences with other people…how we process and go forward really matters. Cynicism by itself can destroy the human spirit…but if you take a bad experience and do something positive with it, it can help heal the wound. Mark did just that. To add one more little piece to the equation, I will share with you a line that my friend Victor always says….”Jennifer, only be good to good people….because bad people will think you’re a sucker.” I must remember to ask Mark if that is good advice…..

Cynicism can be valuable to a point…..but we must never let it rob us of our humanity. People do make mistakes, and overcome them. If we were to cut people off the first time they hurt us there would be no room for forgiveness and conciliation. It falls to each one of us to find the balance that we can handle between love and cynicism within our lives.

May you find the balance,
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2001 Jennifer Avalon

Changes can come about when you least expect it. New relationships, new jobs, new hobbies, and changing addresses. All this can be shocking, to say the least, but one thing always seems to pull us through….loved ones and friends. This week I moved to Cape Cod, and in all honesty, it would have been a lot harder of a move if it wasn’t for my loved ones and friends.

New experiences can seem scary and shaky….but with the right reinforcements, and circle of care, we can weather just about any storm. As they say, no man or woman is an island unto themselves…one never knows when one may be in need of help. That help too, can be reciprocated. Fuel is needed for any new endeavor….the most potent kind of fuel can keep you going for miles. Love is a powerful source of energy.

So what can Love do for us mere mortals? For me, Love is a lighthouse that shows me a safe port and guides me through rough terrain. Love is a river that takes me to a sea of calm. Love is the one thing that always restores me to the center. Love does light the way…..we just have to allow ourselves to let it in.

The past few weeks I have been on a journey of some sort….a move that has taken me hundreds of miles from where I was. Though I knew and accepted where I was going, the fear and uncertainty still accompanied me. The well of Love that I nurtured and replenished was there for me when I needed it. Love is the ultimate food of life….it feeds the hunger of our souls….I believe it is the one thing we take with us when we pass on.

The value of Love on planet Earth can be underestimated….don’t ever make that mistake…..Love is more valuable than the greatest diamond and more precious than a bar of gold. The trick is to realize this while we are here.

Let love fill your heart,

Jennifer Avalon
© 2001 Jennifer Avalon

This week is my last week in my current home. I have enjoyed my time here immensely……a log cabin in the woods has allowed me to regroup, reflect, heal, and move forward. I will never forget my time here, and feel blessed to have experienced the beauty of the mountains. The road of life is an evolving journey, full of memories and new experiences. My road is now set to embark upon a new chapter.

Since I’ve been writing the weekly newsletter, I have moved twice, from New York City to a quaint village on the Hudson River, to a log house in the mountains. Where am I headed now you may ask? Cape Cod, Massachusetts….a place I visited two years ago and knew one day I would end up there. I just didn’t think it would be this soon! I am not saying good-bye to my friends here, for I am sure quite a few will be paying me a visit near the sea. I grew up in Southern California…..to me, it isn’t surprising that I am returning to the ocean.

I’m sure you too have moved a few times…..most of us do. Going through the closets and the drawers is a life-altering experience….do we ever realize what we accumulate, but don’t really need? Anyway, the journey of my life moves on, as does yours. Whether we physically move or not, change surrounds us always.

I’ve realized what’s really important in my life….family, friends, faith, and, oh yes, my little doggies. Thanks to the Internet, I can always write to you from the same place in my heart. The world is getting smaller……and what once used to take days for people to receive, now takes seconds.
So this is my last newsletter from my home in the woods……and the next essays will be sailing to you from the winds of Cape Cod.

Turn the pages,

love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2001 Jennifer Avalon

Howdy Pardners! Each morning we wake up…we get ourselves together, check our horses, tighten our saddles, and head off into the landscape. Riding the range can be both enjoyable and treacherous at times, but as we discover, the better prepared we are for the unexpected, the easier the ride.

The landscape of life has peaks, valleys, desert and rough terrain. Like any good cowboy or cowgirl, it is good to know one’s territory. Like all journeys, there are shortcuts which are learned from experience. It can get dusty out on the trail….but with a couple of good maps and a sturdy horse, we can reach our destinations. Life is kind of like the wild wild West….there are heroes and villians….twists and turns, and rainbows in the mists. Each morning before I set off, I always try to make sure that the saddle is firmly planted on my trusty horse, because as any good range rider knows, to succeed on the ride, the rider and the horse must become one. I never forget the Lone Ranger, who, when he ran into trouble, always had Tonto, Silver, and Tonto’s horse Scout there to lend a helping hand. We don’t have to ride the range alone….groups do set off to find the same destination. But before embarking upon the ride, it’s good to decide who leads and whose expertise can be called upon when needed. Once again, the group to succeed must ride as one.
I wish you well on your ride on the range, and may you discover what it is you are searching for in life. Hey you never know….somewhere along the trail you may see in the distance a cowgirl with a guitar singing some songs around the campfire! That cowgirl might be me. Don’t be shy….mosy on down and sing along…..:)

Happy Trails to you,
Jennifer Avalon
© 2001 Jennifer Avalon

This past week I received quite a few e-mails asking me about my thoughts on the current state of the economy, and where I think things are heading. I am not an analyst, but my opinion is optimistic.

Over the past two years the economy has not only had to absorb the fear of the new Millennium, but also the Internet bubble and a series of rate increases from the Federal Reserve of the United States. We may ask ourselves, was all this fear necessary? Or were so many interest rate hikes needed? Perhaps, or perhaps not, but the most important issue is to understand that life and economies do not run on a straight line….they bend and weave. We have just touched the tip of the iceberg in where technology will lead us. Medicine and energy have a lot more to do before they too run their course. We run and we fall…..we pick ourselves up, learn, and go on. That’s the way it has been here on earth since the beginning of time. The human wave floating on a sea of eternity.

We live in a world where we never know how far we will go down, or how high we will go up. The fear is that if we get too high, the fall will be too great. But there is a stabilizing force that holds it all together, and it is called Vision. If you can hold onto a vision, then you can ride the waves of life and not capsize. It is also doing one’s homework….meaning, seeing why something goes right or wrong, learning from it, so that the next time it happens, logic kicks in….one gets a sense of “Hey, I’ve been here before, I will get through this.” Life is one big School of Learning.

The economy, I believe, will recover. New inventions, new technologies, new medical procedures, etc., are ahead for us. Nothing goes up in a straight line, nor down in a straight line…..even if it feels like it sometimes! The world evolves….it uses each yesterday to build its tomorrow. Out there somewhere is the next Einstein, Gandhi, Walt Whitman, Jonas Salk, Rembrandt, etc. The ship of today sails the waves into tomorrow…….learn from the great sailors, that it is all a matter of timing, and of trusting the ocean to ultimately deliver you to safe harbor.

Good Sailing,
Jennifer Avalon
© 2001 Jennifer Avalon

This past week I made a trip out to Southern California. I would like to share with you some of the observations I made on my journey. As you may know, each flight is unique unto itself….but there are a few things many have in common.
I arrived at the airport as instructed one hour ahead of departure. If I didn’t follow these instructions, the chances were very great that my seat would have been sold off to the highest bidder! In laymen’s terms, that’s called ‘”standby!” Once aboard the airplane, I saw that the seats had enough room so that each human being could feel that they were nicely tucked into a sardine can…..one thing to always consider before boarding a commercial airline these days is to check your weight, because if you have gained a few pounds since your last travel, with the size of the seats, it is highly possible that you may have to purchase an extra seat for your journey! The seating was three seats across…..you pray at this point that the person sitting on the aisle seat next to you isn’t the “passenger from hell,” who may practically expect you to hand over money in order to go to the bathroom! I was sitting in the middle seat….while the man who had the window seat casually mentioned to me, “If they could, they would sell seats on the wings!!!” Strangely, I was reminded of a Flintstone’s episode where Fred and Wilma won first class tickets to an island resort, and Barney and Betty went along third class, which was, you guessed it! Out on the wings!

The trip from New York to Los Angeles is approximately 5 hours and forty-five minutes. A long time for a group of people to be in close proximity to each other. Hopefully, you have ordered a vegetarian meal for your flight, otherwise, you are left with the famous “Rubber Chicken!” A meal that warms one’s heart (ha!)….. even the flight attendant’s are catching onto the joke. The lady serving me said, “Would you like some of our deeeelicious chicken?” halfway through the flight my obnoxious aisle passenger started mumbling to herself, and giving me glances that said, “Don’t even think about asking me to get up!” Through meditation, I was able to stop myself from going to the bathroom for the entire flight! This, boys and girls, is not something you should try at home:)

Once upon landing, I realized just about the entire plane had carryon luggage. These days no one wants to check luggage (including myself). It may be a good idea in the future for the airlines to fly another plane right behind us containing all the carryon baggage. There were people who stuffed their bags so far in on the overhead that they had a very hard time pulling them out. As always, there’s the mad dash for the exit door, where one could easily believe that a prize is given to the first passenger off the plane!

After a few days I completed my trip and headed for the Los Angeles airport, preparing myself for the same routine in reverse. This time I made sure to order a vegetarian meal, and an aisle seat. As the airplane pulled out of the terminal and started to taxi down towards takeoff, all of a sudden the plane grounded to a halt. The pilot announced that the airports in New York were closed indefinitely because of bad weather. I was thinking to myself, what does “indefinitely” mean? One hour, two hours? Or an entire day? My fellow passengers were looking at each other, wondering, at what point do people start to come unglued? But me? Never! I had an aisle seat, no rubber chicken, and a bag nicely tucked in the overhead…and, for my sweet-tooth, a small bag of chocolate snicker bars, which, I may say, were being eyeballed profusely. I made some new friends that flight:)

For your next trip, try to make the skies as friendly as possible….pack lightly, go veggie, bring cologne, gum, and some good reading material. As one passenger mentioned to me when the captain said we were being delayed indefinitely….”It sounds like they’re having a party in the cockpit!” One thing is for sure, the passengers were not on the guest list (ha!)

Happy Trails……

love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2001 Jennifer Avalon

This week’s essay I would like to present as kind of like a Twilight Zone episode….. fantasy, or reality…..who knows? But it may be a way for us to look at life from a different angle. So let’s address “The Program.”
Have you ever noticed that there are reoccuring themes, thoughts and numbers throughout life? So often, we are reminded of something that has happened to us before and maybe something that is yet to come. It almost seems, that in some strange way, our lives progress through similar themes. A child can experience a thought at five years old that twenty years later evolves into reality. A friend of mine recently shared with me a repetitious dream that his son had at a young age, of driving a red convertible. Lo and behold, for high school graduation, what car do you think his son wanted for his gift? Well, we could say that this was in his son’s subconscious all along….interestingly, his son has no recollection of his earlier dream.

I myself was born and raised in Southern California. I too, as a child, remember whenever I looked at scenes of New England (where I had never been) in my history books I would get a jolt, as if it was extremely familiar. Have a guess where I am moving to in August?….New England. I was the only one in my family to ever leave California. Coincidence? Wishful thinking? Perhaps….but many people have these strange events happen to them time and time again.
I have always believed that life is a learning experience. A process that we all go through to, hopefully, improve who we are. In a way, we write the program each day we live…..but could it be we are also writing what we sense will happen in the future, and what we feel has happened in the past? Wasn’t it Einstein who said that the past, the present, and the future can coexist at the same time? I know I’m getting a little “out there,” but if it’s possible for the past, present and future to overlap, one can get glimpses along the way…….a program.

Many things happen to us that we can’t explain. All I’m trying to do with this week’s essay is place on the table some thoughts to consider for the times that don’t make sense, or are hard to comprehend. If our lives could be seen from the beginning to the end on a giant television screen, wouldn’t it be an interesting series….an interesting program?

Enjoy the show,

love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2001 Jennifer Avalon

In life, some decisions are always easy. We look at something and we say yes, or no….. but the ones where we feel confusion, difficulty or a plain old blank stare, those are the ones that place us “on the fence.”

Relationships, jobs, where we live, etc., are in many cases choices that we make over the course of our lives. Sprinkled in among these choices are the ones that many times turn out to be the most profound….the “maybes.” The ones that say, “it could go one way or another.” The oddball ones….the upside down choices….the conflicts that come out of left field. The “on the fence” decisions are the ones we either never saw coming, or are not prepared to deal with right away….they are the ones that we mull over, which eventually have to be decided, in order for us to go on.

“On the fence” is not always the best place to be…..but it does give us the chance to reevaluate where we are and where we want to go. For example: You’re working at a job where you have been for the past eight years. You get along great with everybody at the office…..hey, even the boss loves you! Then all of a sudden, out of the clear blue sky, you run into somebody at a party and during the conversation, that person is struck by your talent and decides to offer you a job on the spot, at double your present salary. Inconceivable, you may say? It happens all the time. Anyway, you go home, mulling over the thought of whether you should take the offer, or stay put at the job where you have been for the past eight years. One more little ingredient to throw into the pie….. at your present job there is only so much further you can go, while at this new offer, promotion potential is extensive. The decision that we make in these moments can drastically alter not only the course of our own lives, but our families too. A typical “on the fence” decision.

So how do we decide? One way is to limit our chances for mistakes. Make a list of the pros and cons for staying at the present job, or taking the new one. Research as much as possible the advantages and disadvantages of both. It is never easy leaving a place where it is safe and comfortable……but we must always ask ourselves, if we stay in our present position, will the air eventually become stale because of lack of movement? Change is sometimes a frightening thought….but without it the air cannot stay fresh. Human beings are a strange crew indeed….we want safety, but not at the cost of boredom. We may also decide to stay put in our present job, because the company is more stable. Perhaps all that is needed may be to open a window….let a little fresh air in. One way or another, the decision eventually rests with us.
We go through a number of these situations in our lives….many times each one unique in its own way. The most important point is that we come out of these phases stronger and more sure of who we are and where we are going. The fence gives us the ability to reevaluate where we place our feet and which direction they will travel.

Place your feet on solid ground,
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2001 Jennifer Avalon

Recently one of my friends mentioned to me that he attended his 25th High School Reunion. He was surprised how few showed up. Thankfully, two of his teachers were still at the school…..and they said, that as time goes on, more and more former classmates come back. My friend said to me, “Jennifer, one thing’s for sure….for me, the good memories have been heightened with age, and the bad ones seem to have fallen by the wayside.”

For many, time is a strange healer. It can take our years, and heal our wounds at the same time. My high school days seem closer to me now then they were ten years ago. How can that be, you may ask? Well perhaps because I now can realize how important those memories are. I still have a good relationship with a couple of my high school girlfriends….we always send birthday and Christmas cards…we never stay out of touch for too long. Times may change, and even the school itself, but graduation year a group of people shared something in common, that only those within that group can understand……kind of like a team that wins a championship……they too are bonded forever.

So how about you? Do you ever wonder what happened to the members of that class you graduated with? Have you kept up any friendships over the years? Have you been back for a reunion? One website I would like to pass along, where many classmates can find each other is: Classmates.com. Check out your school….see who you can re-connect with. Many of our fellow students may have spread across the four corners of the world……but luckily the Internet has a way of bringing them back together. Yeah, I know…..we may not be the same people we were in high school, but like that championship team, we share a history.

I like to look at reunions as a way to rekindle the past……and using it as a scope to chart the future. A wise man once said, how can you know where you’re going, if you’ve forgotten where you’ve been? Our lives are laden with relationships we’ve had….some we may choose to forget, but others we may want to revisit.

Say hello to the past,
love, Jennifer
© 2001 Jennifer Avalon

The past couple of months has been a time of change for me. I have made my music available through a new arrangement with MP3.com, I have started a new radio show called “Walk of Life,” and after several years with AOL I have moved my e-mail correspondence to Hotmail. Through all this, I have learned never to have all your eggs with one company. Quite a few changes, huh?

When I started all this it was always my goal for my music and words to be available for free. Now I know artists and writers need money to survive….thankfully, over the past few years many of you have embraced my music and writings. Nevertheless, I have always thought about a person with little means having the chance to access music and words for free. Knowledge should never be totally based on money. Finally, technology and the Internet are coming to grips with that perspective. For me, MP3 gives me the ability to allow the whole world to access my work, and allowing the listener to decide whether they want to purchase or download, while paying me per listener.

Where will this Jennifer Avalon Newsletter end up? Hopefully, it would be wonderful to broadcast a live, or taped, video streamed program from my livingroom. Impossible, you may ask? Within the next 18 months, it may become a reality. How about that? Getting invited through the Internet for dinner at Jennifer’s house around eightish? (ha!) I would love to have you there:)

Each essay, every week, will now be available at the “Walk of Life” radio station, which includes past essays, music, and hopefully soon, a little poetry to go with it. For me, very new beginnings. A great way for me to extend an open hand.

Cheers,
Jennifer Avalon
© 2001 Jennifer Avalon