As we head towards the end of a year, and the beginning of a new one, this is the time when the Dreamweavers come out of hibernation and plot their course for new directions. Each year around December, the Dreamweavers evaluate the present and past year and prepare to embark upon new dreams from seeds that they plant in January. Dreamweavers are bold, fearless, faithful people who believe anything can be accomplished with the right amount of faith, hard work, knowledge, and ability. The Dreamweaver lives in all of us…..all that is needed is for it to be awakened.

Every year we make our New Year resolutions, hoping to improve our quality of life. For the Dreamweavers, complacency is unacceptable. Each year springs forth new ideas, new hopes, new successes. They see their lives like a ladder….where each step is embraced and tackled. True Dreamweavers do not step upon the graves of others….they chart their own trails, where the air is clear and the space is wide. Dreamweavers are humble people who are fully aware that the blessings they receive are given to them so they can give something back to others.

Dreamweavers do not sacrifice their morals for material success….they try in their own small way to make the world a better place. Dreamweavers are people who realize that when the heart is not considered, the destination becomes pointless. Their minds may seek ideas, but their hearts make the choices. Thought and emotion hold equal weight. Dreamweavers believe that only positive motion can move one forward.
In these trying times, we need the Dreamweavers more than ever. They are the ones who can reinvent, seek the balance, and expose the wounds so that healing can begin. Dreamweavers come in all walks of life….firemen, police officers, craftsmen, doctors, artists, writers, etc….the common thread is that they are all able to dream the dream. Everything comes from thought….the Dreamweavers weave the thought into reality. The Dreamweaver is conscience with purpose….no dream is too small….nor too big.

Dream on….
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2002 Jennifer Avalon

Across the human spectrum, we all live. At one end is God….at the other, is the Ego. The fanatics who are at the extreme level of the God corner are willing to do anything…lie, cheat, steal, maim and kill, in what they consider to be “In the name of God.” It comes down to their way, or the highway, while portraying themselves as Messengers of the Almighty. To these people, anything goes, because in their minds, they are not only doing “God’s Work,” but ridding the world of those who believe differently. On the other side are the Egomaniacs…..just as deadly, just as threatening. They believe that there is no God…..they alone have the intellect and intelligence to solve mankind’s problems for us all. Egomaniacs cannot stay in a room for very long without creating a stage for themselves and denouncing all other points of view. This is the core problem of civilization.

We mere mortals have to choose where on the spectrum we live. For me, I totally believe in the existence of God, and as a Christian, Jesus Christ, while at the same time I recognize that my Ego must be kept in check as much as possible. Yes, I guess you could say that I try my best to find the middle ground….not being fanatical either way…..trying to be a fair individual in a world that sometimes seems quite chaotic. As I believe that it is important to not get obsessive about my beliefs, it is also critical to not forget that there is something greater than myself. Most of the problems of our world are caused by religious fanatics, and God-less individuals who see and believe in nothing more then themselves and the power they can attain. These two opposite types will do anything and everything to pull in as many people as they can to jump onto their bandwagon. History has shown this time and time again.

There are Christians, Jews, Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists, etc…..many good people who want to make the world a better place. It becomes a responsibility to each individual to keep themselves in check to not go too far to the extreme on either side. Man is not an island unto himself….neither is he a world. We are all part of the Heavens.

I would like to share with you a personal observation of God Versus the Ego, and all that is in-between:

My father was a man of much knowledge…very well-read…a skilled navigator, and yachtsman. My Dad was the skipper on Humphrey Bogart’s schooner the Santana. Each weekend they would go out and wine and dine with Hollywood’s elite. As you can imagine, going back to work on Monday sometimes could be difficult. Over time, my Dad’s ego grew in stature. For a child, he easily resembled a towering figure. My father’s stories of his days with Bogie and friends were always the highlight of conversation at family parties. Believe me, his Ego was fully exposed. This went on for the better part of my life. Eventually we reached a meeting of the ways and developed a mutual respect. In his final year of life I saw something extraordinary….during his last summer on earth I visited him and upon entering his home I saw a look in his eyes that brought tears to mine. With one look, my father showed that the Ego had been stripped away, and the beautiful child that he once was could clearly be seen. My father, who wasn’t very religious, or spiritual during his life, faced death with dignity and humility. I spent an afternoon alone with him where we reminisced about the past and discussed the future. I thought to myself, wouldn’t it have been wonderful if he could have been like this all the time? The truth is, deep inside he was always that wonderful child….it was the Ego that kept it from coming through. The greatest gift a person can give is their heart without their Ego. Perhaps that’s what God expects of us all the while….to be faithful, confident, and humble. Faithful for belief, confident for the strength to achieve and prosper, and humble to appreciate.

The compass of life is there for all of us…we decide which direction we go. There will always be smooth sailing, or stormy weather…. he or she, with the right charts, will find their way home. God lives in all of us, and so too does the Ego. The challenge is to find the balance.

smooth sailing,
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2002 Jennifer Avalon

Beware of rumors, opinions and stories…… I would like to share with you an incident that happened to me recently. I was visiting my local coffee shop, when Bob, the storeowner, was being told a local newsflash that had just happened. What was mentioned to Bob was that a body had been found in the garden of a neighbor near the highway. Jane told Bob that behind the bushes was a dead man who appeared to have been killed overnight. In the course of the next hour, three or four other people came in and told Bob the same story. This is where it all starts to get interesting.

As the hours began to click on by, the story started to change….what was once a dead body, found in a garden, had now turned into a dead man with no arms or legs. By late afternoon, the dead body had become a woman with just a head!! Obviously, as the story made its rounds throughout the neighborhood and passed from person to person, it took on a life of its own…..this often happens to many aspects of our own lives.

How many of us out there have heard something that after a while takes a one hundred and eighty degree turn and becomes something totally different? Storytelling itself is an art…..and like all good stories over time it’s very easy for some to include their own two cents, or their own interpretation. It’s not so hard to imagine why in court cases two witnesses can observe the same crime and come away with drastically different opinions. Within each occurrence is the event…..and the interpretation.

So can the past be fully trusted? Information passing over time through human beings, can get distorted. The history books seem to get revised every decade, for that very reason. When we pull back from events, and let the dust settle, we are sometimes confused and alarmed at how different things may look. History means his/story, or her/story…..an evolving story that has the potential to take on a life of its own. Could it be that there are chapters of our history that are laced with opinion, with absence of fact? If a story in one tiny neighborhood can change so drastically in a matter of hours, what can be said of an entire world over the span of a century? When we read on the front page of our papers the latest happenings, one has to question how much we are not being told. We assume that what we are being told in the present is the truth, but how can we assume that, if we know in the past some details of events have been proven to be false?

So, is it so wrong to question each story we hear…..until we know the facts? Perhaps not……when life itself is a never-ending story?

read between the lines,
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2002 Jennifer Avalon

This past year has been a prime example for the history books…each time we feel that we are getting our feet on solid ground, and things are stabilizing, something or someone seems to pull the rug out from underneath us, which sends us back to the drawing boards. With all the tragedies that go on in the world, with 9/11, there was not any rulebook, signpost, or tools to go to, to understand how we were to react, and go on….but go on we must.

So what is an optimistic pessimist? For me, it is someone who is aware of the dangers that the future can bring, but hopeful that they can be avoided. Many, I believe, over the past year, have fallen under this term. We want to believe that the worst is behind us, yet, we fear the unknown. What I’ve discovered is that buried deep in the debris is a learning process that must take hold, so that the actions of 9/11 are not to be repeated. If the process is ignored, the outcome is inevitable.

In World War 1 and 11, opposing armies faced each other and hurled multiple weapons back and forth. Sadly, now all it takes is one bomb launched from some terrain in the mist to start a chain reaction where intelligence flys out the window. The optimistic pessimist says, “Hopefully, this process can be avoided, if the vision of the future has clarity.” Somewhere inside I can’t help but shake the feeling that there is something very very important that we are to learn from these times. Could it be that through all of our inventions, we have reached the point of understanding that some creations produce miracles, while others can destroy life as we know it. Technology that is held in the hands of the open heart, will understand the responsibility. The same tools held in the hands of the closed fist, will feel no remorse. The same rules cannot be applied to both, because each pursues a different outcome.

So the optimistic pessimist journeys on….not in denial, and remaining hopeful. Seeing what can be….and praying that it is avoided. This world can become Heaven, or it could become Hell…..we all have a say in which way the wind blows…..

may wise winds prevail,
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2002 Jennifer Avalon

As much as there are parts of the past we choose to forget, some of it we still cherish. The collection of memories that we carry with us to this day make up who we are. Things may not go always according to plan, but hopefully over time we live and learn. The “good old days” may be gone, but perhaps there are still many good times yet to come. The past creeps up behind us, and taps us on the shoulder once in a while…..still, heading towards us, is the breeze of the future. All the while, past and future encircles us in the present.

Pain and joy, the main two experiences, we handle throughout our lives. We savor the comfort of some memories of our yesterdays….fearful at times of what tomorrow may bring. What lies ahead, who knows? But hopefully, we can learn to change the things that bring us pain and enhance those that bring us joy. All of us are Time Travelers….darting back and forth through our memories and our dreams. Time Travelers, searching for a place where everything makes sense, never giving up hope that one day we will find the promised land.
The more we live, the more we discover the riddle of life….traveling through time, stopping at ports before heading back out to sea. Time can be our friend, or our enemy…..wisdom helps us make the choice. As the years may change the way we look, we are never too far removed from the child we once were, while coming towards us, not too far in the distance, is what we are to become.

So, Fellow Time Traveler, how is your journey going? I myself wish I could have made less mistakes, gained more wisdom earlier, but, hopefully, there are still more tomorrow’s to make the changes when need be. Sitting on the table before us each day are three piles of sand, the past, the present, the future. As we live on, the quantity of each pile changes, but the amount stays the same. So much for the mystery of life….there it is, right before us, if we choose to see it. The sands of time, that swirl around us.

Yes, indeed…..Human Time Travelers, pressing on through time and space, picking up souvenirs along the way, realizing that one day, we come Home. When we unload our cargo we reveal where we have been, what we have changed, who we have helped, and what we have learned. The journey through life, where perhaps Heaven and Earth got a little closer.

Enjoy the flight,
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2002 Jennifer Avalon

Since 9/11, it’s been real hard to take a real pulse on what’s been happening. Enron, Anthrax, the Middle East Conflict, and Wall Street’s Woes, have left many of us baffled and confused. Most of the e-mails I receive regarding these times are broken down into two camps…..Camp One looks at all that’s going on now as the beginning of the End Times, like a plane in a nosedive, where the pilot is trying to pull up with little success. Camp Two says “Enough already! Everything will work itself out, let’s not get too pessimistic, and before you know it, we’ll all be off and running again.” You can see the dilemma that I face each week, trying to decide what to address as the topic of the newsletter. Of course, both sides are right, and both sides are wrong. All of the things that have happened since 9/11 have embarked us on a journey, where we’re not quite sure of the destination. But we have to be hopeful and positive that we will prevail, and life does go on.

So I’ve decided from here on to offer up as much positive force and thoughts as possible, while being realistic regarding the hurdles we face. Denial has never been one of my traits. But one does have to have hope. These past 3 weeks I’ve sat back, taken a little rest, and reflected on the past year and the next 12 months ahead. I’m sure we’ll all be faced with obstacles and struggles…..but we will learn and go on. I do believe, with the potential that we know can happen to this world, we are starting an inward look at ourselves, as people, as families, and as countries. Each century the world has to reinvent itself, otherwise it cannot go on. I do believe we are at that time again.

So as some of our problems may remain the same, when we walk out each morning we realize there is a new breeze in the air, that tells us things have changed. We can no longer take loved ones for granted, our gifts have taken on a new meaning, and our goals have been realigned to fit the new world. We all know what we face, but we also know these are the times when great things and great people step forward. If our intellect truly exists, we will find the answers. There’s a great episode of Star Trek where Captain Kirk says to a member of a lesser evolved species, “We realized one day that in order to go on, we had to accept each other’s differences and learn to live together peacefully.” If logic prevails, like Mr. Spock, we too will live on and prosper.

It’s logical:)
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2002 Jennifer Avalon

Isn’t it interesting….that certain aspects of life seem to follow a pattern. For example, you head off during the day and one thing seems to go wrong after another, or, at each intersection, you make every green light. Strange, isn’t it? Well, for the lack of a better word, I call these occurrences “trends.”
People in the stock market understand trends quite well. They come out and tell us where they believe the market is headed, based upon past history. Can we too look upon our past histories to better understand the trends that affect our lives, what causes them, and what changes them?

Recently I read an article about an understudy actor on Broadway who was there for when the leading star of the play couldn’t perform. The play was running for 3 months, when lo and behold, one night the call came in that the leading actor would not be able to give his performance that evening. The understudy knew that this perhaps could be his chance to light up the lights of Broadway. In sharing his feelings, the understudy explained all the work and preparation he had put into his craft, which prepared him for that night. What happened was the understudy gave such an incredible performance, that 2 weeks later he heard from Hollywood that they wanted to cast him in a new soap opera that they were developing. Was he just “lucky?” or was he prepared for something that has happened time and time again….the Trend. How many other stories are out there about the undiscovered actor or actress who gets their “lucky break.” If this trend does exist, wouldn’t it be unwise for any “understudy” in a play, to not be prepared for their moment to shine?

The trend can be friend or foe. The awareness of its existence can, in many cases, help determine the outcome. If one observes a negative trend developing, and he or she is aware that this has happened before, by that awareness they may be able to stop it, and turn it around. Same can be said for positive trends….when they occurred before, could they have been extended? By understanding the trends, we may be able to get a better control over their lengths, by making the positive trends longer, and perhaps, negative trends shorter.

Johnny Carson, the legendary talk show host, was once asked, how does he react to the ratings of his show? He replied, “They go up, and sometimes they go down. I learned a long time ago, everything runs in cycles.” Johnny fully understood that trends exist, and he adapted accordingly. I believe we too run through cycles, and trends, in our lives. The trick is to learn from them, so that each turn of the wheel we become a little wiser, and more compassionate. Yes, there are new trends, but history has an uncanny way of repeating itself.

Amend the trend,
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2002 Jennifer Avalon

Yes, indeed….unless somebody has discovered a miraculous way to extend the amount of hours that make up a day, either you control the cycle, or it controls you. We all fall victim, in one way or another, to the hands on the clock. We ask ourselves, “Where did the time go?? I can’t believe it’s 5PM already!! or, Is it really Friday again??” Father Time has an uncanny ability to step right into our lives and walk away with precious moments. This scenario continues until the day comes when we stand our ground and say, “Enough already! I decide what happens to my day!!”

So let’s examine this clock on the wall…..most of us need at least 8 hours of sleep (if we’re lucky) So for argument’s sake, let’s slice off the hours between 10PM and 6AM. That leaves us with 16 hours. The countdown begins….we then head off to work, and donate another 8 hours of our time. I know, the boss sometimes demands a little bit more than that. But lets stick with 8. That leaves us with a grand total of 8 hours to enjoy. This is where the fun begins…as we can imagine, when looked at under this kind of scenario, those hours become like pieces of gold. Precious gems that we use to signify our lives on a personal level. Is it any wonder why so many people feel pressure, have health problems, and have trouble relating to each other?
I heard on the television this morning that the average person in the United States spends around 150 hours a year commuting to and from the office. I haven’t even included this statistic….so let’s just stick with 8 hours remaining. If we don’t take control of that time, it evaporates. If one has a relationship, and/or children, friends and pets….scheduling those 8 hours becomes key.

Can it really be that life comes down to 8 hours a day…..perhaps so. But with a little planning, we can take hold of those 8 hours and squeeze it like a lemon, to make lemonade. So before we go into carving up these 8 hours, during that commuter time play some music on a CD player, or listen to an audio book. That way, commuter time is not wasted. If you are using mass transit, bring along something to read. That way the journey will go faster. So let’s get back to those 8 hours. Within that time we have to have dinner, communicate with our children, have a relationship with our spouse or mate, make sure the house is clean, and find a few spare moments for ourselves. The planning of those 8 hours becomes key. Most of us feel overwhelmed just thinking about it, and+- we could pretend that none of this matters. Then all that would happen would be that as we get older, we become more bitter. Our lives do matter….that is why I take the management of Time so seriously.

If you find the pressure of Time overwhelming, you are not alone. Each one of us are dealing with it. It comes down to us, against Father Time. Do we sit back and allow him to come through the door and steal another day? Or do we take a slice from the pizza pie and tell him, that’s all he’s getting today? I don’t know about you, my little pie is pretty carved up…but I try to always reserve the smallest piece for my daily guest, Father Time.

Bon Appetit!
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2002 Jennifer Avalon

Normal is the presence and level of life that we deem acceptable. Normal has changed over time….and since 9/11, we are all finding new ways to come to terms with the definition of “normal.” The world believed that an array of nuclear, biological and chemical weapons would never be used on a mass scale. A false sense of security? perhaps….but this acceptance that nothing catastrophic would ever happen in our lives was factored into our perception of what we considered “the norm.” Over the past 6 months what we have learned is that what we once thought was highly unlikely, is now a distinct possibility. Daily on television, one expert or another reveals what a nuclear weapon can do, where it could do the most damage, and lo and behold, how to construct one. A “dirty bomb,” which now is considered the weapon of choice for terrorists, we are informed can easily be put together and detonated. Yes, indeed, “normal” has changed.

I could not believe my eyes reading an article yesterday where a military expert said that a dirty bomb could kill thousands, and without blinking an eye he said these are “acceptable numbers.” What would not be acceptable to him would be a nuclear attack which could kill millions. Okay, let me get this straight….I have to factor into my definition of “normal” the possibility that it may become common news that dirty bombs will be detonated more than once? The expert also mentioned that in this day and age people will have to learn to live with the possibilities of suicide bombings, dirty bombs, etc. Some people have had to live with the reality of this kind of life for years. This is new to the people of the United States. On a personal and public level, we try daily to maintain some level of balance in our lives…..a lifestyle we can cope with, which fuels growth and improvement. When change is entered into the mix, we absorb it, and recalculate our vision of the norm. In the not too distant future, who knows what changes are going to have to be absorbed by us?

Through all these changes, we will go on. Just like we get over losing loved ones, going through divorces, and finding new jobs. We do go on. The most important point to realize is that there is a bigger picture….that as we go through changes we must learn from them. I believe one of the most meaningful elements of life is to become a better person. As scary and chilling some of the events of the past few months have become, they have helped us grow, and become better people. We don’t quite look at life the same way, or take people’s kindness and good gestures for granted. We too have incorporated this into our level of “normal.”

love,
Jennifer Avalon
© 2002 Jennifer Avalon

This past week in the United States, many terrorist warnings were issued for the country and specifically, for the New York area. The warnings ranged from nuclear reactors to airplanes, trains, and boats, until it trickled down to scuba divers! To put it mildly, all of this frayed many nerves. Human beings are a strange bunch….they can handle stress and anxiety to a point, until they start to find unusual ways to grapple with it. What is emerging in the United States post 9/11, and for that matter, in other parts of the world, is something called “dark humor.” To give an example of dark humor, here is a quote from a stock trader on Wall Street when asked why the market was rising in the face of bad news. He replied, “Well we all know we’re going to get nuked, but in the meantime, let’s have a party and make some money!” Another example of dark humor was chuckled by a local news anchor, who said, “Let me get this straight….there are all these warnings coming in every day…..so tell me, at what point am I supposed to just kill myself?” Dark humor is becoming a new pastime that Americans are expressing to cope with the current crisis. A friend of mine recently mentioned to me, “Jennifer, things are so bad that at some point you just have to laugh, because it feels like you’re in the middle of a horror movie.” Tom Ridge, the Homeland Security Czar appointed by President Bush, has a color coded system in place to let us know the level of the warning. Well, as you can imagine, this too has fallen victim to dark humor. “What does yellow mean? Why are we permanently at yellow/neutral when perhaps we should be at full red/alert? And how bad does it have to get before we reach red/alert?” some are asking. A radio talk show host reported over the airwaves the other day that if he hears that the nuclear reactor near him is under attack, he will casually walk out onto his porch, sit down, open a nice bottle of wine, and wait for the prevailing winds!! Dark humor, yes? These are the kinds of thoughts that Americans are sharing with each other to ease the tension.

Post 9/11 we are discovering new ways to use our imaginations to cope with daily life. In some strange way, by joking at times about the situation, it helps us get in touch with our humanity. I do believe if the situation continues, it will only be a matter of time before comedy clubs specializing in dark humor start popping up. It’s gotten to the point in the good old US of A that when you turn off your television for a couple of hours, you cringe when it’s time to turn it back on. This past week the Brooklyn Bridge itself had a warning posted against it. Now please tell me, what on earth would anybody get out of blowing up the Brooklyn Bridge?? This past Friday it was announced by the authorities to keep an eye out for scuba divers coming on shore….a friend of mine who heard the warning looked at me and said, “What’s next? dolphins??” With all the warnings that have been issued recently, we have now just about covered every form of attack that is possible on humankind. I’m sure clever minds can add a few more to the list, if challenged.

Truly, terrible things have happened here in America. Loss of life is never funny. But to move forward, we have to find ways to handle it. Dark humor is just one of those ways. Behind each joke of dark humor are tears. We cry, we laugh, we live.

Keep living,
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2002 Jennifer Avalon