My definition of intelligence has greatly changed over the years. I used to believe that intelligence boiled down to having the most diplomas on the wall. I used to believe that belonging to the right societies, serving on cultural boards or counting the visits to the museum was a correct gauge of one’s knowledge. Unfortunately, a person can do all of these things, and still remain stupid.

Our great society has inflicted upon us a warped sense of pure intelligence. If the goal in life is to attain Peace, and Love, truly…..can we find it in a dollar bill? Being cultured, indeed, is important, as is financial responsibility….but, can they alone be the barometer of intellect? I don’t think so. Stupidity is a trait that is inflicted upon a person over time. The only way to overcome it is to understand why it exists, and search for the cure. So let’s take a look at what makes someone stupid, and how one can evolve from it.
As I have said before, culture and finance…two of the main gauges of success in a society, can leave us feeling empty and depressed upon achievement. How many multimillionaires have we read about over time who have spent their last days feeling empty and lost? I don’t know about you, but if I had accumulated a large amount of money in my life, and at the end of my days felt lost…I would consider myself stupid. How many more intellectual or literary writers do we need to read about, who were acclaimed by their peers, who committed suicide because they felt worthless? Yes, indeed, they fulfilled their art, but personally they were left feeling morose. Some, you could say developed psychological disorders…but overall, did they realize that their search for success and notoriety led them to the wrong place? There are four people that I know in my life who are all financially independent, and surrounded by loved ones, yet, they spend their days feeling sorry for themselves, angry, and plotting how to manipulate the next kind soul that comes their way. This is the definition of stupidity.

So what do I think real intelligence is? I think it is the realization that the true purpose of life is to Love, and be Loved unconditionally. For me, Love and God coexist together. Love is God….and God is Love. If in my endeavors I do not incorporate the ingredient of Love, then my goal cannot involve intelligence. The purpose of Life has to be to leave this earth a little better for having been here. It has been said many times, by people far smarter than me. Real intelligence, I believe, eventually leads one to this conclusion: that Faith, Peace, Love, and Life are priceless and precious…..without them, we are nothing more than hollow shells, adrift in a sea of stupidity.

Love,
Jennifer Avalon
© 2003 Jennifer Avalon

The two facets of life that overall inflict the mightiest highs and most devastating lows are Love and Money. Emotions and Finance…a powerful concoction that moves through our lives over time. The better we understand their affects, the more control and discipline we will have over the joy/pain factor. Responsibility is a key ingredient for both…still, a full comprehension is needed if we are to get a handle on their affects.

Let us ponder the thought…how important is it in our lives who we love, and who loves us? God loves us unconditionally, but human to human love can be a whole different scenario. Who we choose to love sets the stage for at least fifty percent of the daily influences in our lives. If we are in a healthy and growing relationship, we prosper and evolve…basically becoming better people. When in a destructive and suppressive environment, we become trapped and stagnate. Is it any wonder why the infliction of depression is so common these days? So it falls to us to try the best we can to choose relationships that can nurture our lives in a positive way. Yes indeed, relationships do go sour sometimes…and one must move on…but it’s always good to keep in mind how important emotional partnerships really are.

Finances…or for a better word, plain old money…in my life’s experiences have delivered the hardest blows. Many of my friends, myself included, have learned sometimes the hard way that “There ain’t no free lunch” 🙂 the bill eventually comes in the mail!:) If only in the present moment we realize that each financial decision we make so greatly can affect our tomorrow, we may think twice of buying an item that we will eventually pay back three times it’s value. Hey, we all need a home, a car, etc., but isn’t it interesting…it’s the mundane and temporary stuff that costs the most. So many books have been written on how to become financially independent…yet still most Americans get to retirement age with little or no savings. Money, as one says, could be the root of all evil…but that all depends on what you do with it.
Is it so important to marry the millionaire? Do we really think we would be happier? Do movie stars really have a better life? Each night on our television screens a parade of individuals are pranced out before us, telling us “We’ve made it! This is the way to live!!” Only to at some point watch them crash. The heart and the pocketbook, talk about opposites attracting! So what do we do? Is there Nirvana? The perfect world, where everything is wonderful and beautiful all of the time? Yes there is, but it’s not here.

As some say “The day is evil, it is up to us to make it good.” Wouldn’t it be incredible if each life was enriched by Love, and balanced by Finance….think about all the good that one could do with all that extra time. Then there could be no excuses, only the Truth of who we are.

Embrace the balance,
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2003 Jennifer Avalon

Let’s imagine for a moment that our life is a lake in the middle of a forest…. calm, serene, with greenery all around us. The perfect setting for a peaceful life, except in this world, is it realistic to believe that this perfect picture cannot change? Our peaceful lake unfortunately is exposed to all the elements and winds of change that life can throw at it. As much as we prepare, it is always wise to expect the unexpected.

Rain, wind, sun and evolving landscapes are what our lake has to contend with. There is life and death as we travel the shores of time, yet, why do we expect our own individual lives to have a different climate than the lake? Aren’t we too exposed to all the elements? For humans it’s just a touch different…yet not by much. Like the lake, we have our share of good days and bad ones…and still we go on. The acceptance of reality is key. We learn like the lake to preserve ourselves….to grow, to become stronger, so that the next time we are hit with adversity, we have better defenses to weather the storm. Like the lake, around us are other forms of life…we all battle the same weather. The winds may blow at us, but our neighbors too are confronted with it’s breath also….. there are people sharing the same tapestry of life. Acceptance of change is one of the hardest things we mere mortals must do. We fight it, but eventually it happens. Don’t feel alone…there is not a living creature that doesn’t have to come to terms with change….even the lake.

On a starry night, look up at the Heavens…take a glimpse for a moment of all the life that surrounds you….and somewhere, in some forest, is a lake reflecting the same moonlight. We all share the Heavens…..

Love thy neighbor,
Jennifer Avalon
© 2003 Jennifer Avalon

From the day we breathe our first breath, we are inundated with sights and sounds that shape our consciousness. With each breath, we are allowed to continue the journey through the fields of mortality. This Gift of Life should never be taken for granted….far too many have fought so hard to defend it, and hold on for just one more day. As we rise each morning, we are given a chance to bask in the wonderment of Divine Creation.

Physical existence is simply a dance between life and death. Each year we push forward to the next….to continue our quest of growth, and a greater understanding of who we are, and why we are here…until the day comes for us to leave. I used to have quite a different opinion of life and death….but over the years I have learned to see that at some point, death is a gift too. How so, you may ask? Well, a person sick and in pain, or inflicted with a terminal disease that is so excruciating, will at some point pray to be let go. To quote singer/songwriter Warren Zevon, who last week passed away from lung cancer, “To not live is a sin.” Warren embraced his final months with dignity and humor. Many of his friends were known to have heard him say, “I just want to live long enough to see the next James Bond movie!”, and, “It’s important to enjoy every sandwich!” Last Sunday Warren peacefully passed away, while taking an afternoon nap. His final months were spent recording a new CD called, oddly enough, “The Wind.” A fine example of a man who grasped his life and accepted his death. In his last interview, he said, “I’ve been very lucky…I’ve had the chance to live two lives…the first one, a crazy rock star, ranting and raving around the stage each night, and the other, twenty years of sobriety where I got to spend valuable time with my family.”

Life indeed is a series of stages. From birth to death and all the in-between. Seeing that no one yet has been able to live forever, death becomes the final gift of life. It is not an end, but a new beginning. To overcome the fear of death is perhaps the ultimate gift of life, because in doing so, every moment has value. Life is really nothing more than a grandiose vacation, where one day it is time to go home.

Live the Gift,
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2003 Jennifer Avalon

This week many of us will see images over the television screen that will relive the horror that happened on 9/11. It is hardly believable that two years have passed, yet for some, including myself, the passing time has felt like ten years. So much information, renewal, tears, mourning….and still, we have to go on.

We have learned much about ourselves…both personally and as a society. The problems of the world are no longer half a planet away…in an instant they can be in our own backyard. The love and the joy that we once took for granted has changed. If Time could be traded on the stockmarket, you would see that its value has increased significantly. Many of us have our opinions of how we got here…and where we are going. One thing’s for sure….we’ve changed.

We are all wounded in one way or another…each day we try to find ways to heal those wounds. The world too has to deal with its wounds, and try to find its healing. Mankind has tried time and again to correct the mistakes, yet strangely, where one problem is solved, another one is created. Could it be that Man’s failure for lasting Peace is because he has come up with the wrong answers? Could the answers be with a Higher Power?

We pride ourselves as a civilization that follows the Law of God….yet around the world there are so many different interpretations of that Law of God. So let’s make it easy…suppose tomorrow a Special Assembly was scheduled at the United Nations, and the guest speakers would be a Representative of the foundations of the world’s religions. To represent Judaism, you could have Abraham or Moses….to represent Christianity, Jesus Christ. To represent Muslims, Allah, to represent Buddhism, Buddah…….etc.,etc. So how could these Prophets appear? Their words and teachings would tell us all how we should handle our current problems. The Prophets of Peace would gives us the answers. The question is…can the ego of man accept the conclusion that he is not God?

As you can see, I, like you, have done much pondering. Yes, there will always be those who have nothing better to do than to wreak havoc…the point is to learn as much as we can about ourselves and why we are here. 9/11 has taught us that even in one of the most prosperous countries of the world, in a New York minute, everything can change.

In Remembrance,
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2003 Jennifer Avalon

Each morning after a couple of cups of coffee, I look at the day ahead and ask myself “What can I do today to surpass the 50 percent rate?” ….that to me is the point where we overcome the negative forces of life and tilt the scales to the positive. To accomplish this takes focus, awareness, planning, and the belief that it can be done. Some days I reach 60 percent or even 80 percent, and indeed once in a while I do fall short with just a performance of around 35:) Each day is a new game with the scorecard of life. We all have tough days … that’s not the point … it’s the days that could go either way…. those are the days where we can make a difference. We can win more than we lose at the game of life. Whether we decide to participate or not, around us the game does go on.

What I try to do is break the days down into sections: morning, afternoon and night. That way the day as a whole does not get too overwhelming. There is a good chance that something will go not according to plan at some point during the day…. to look at the time in compartments can allow us to focus and redirect. If I fall behind in the morning, I still can catch up in the afternoon. The hardest task to do in the game of life is to stay centered and focused. The distraction is everywhere. Like everything else, the more we practice the better we get.

What has helped me, is to keep a scorecard of my performance. Each hour is given a percentage of how I’ve done. This has been a good way for me to see how things are going and what changes I need to make to increase the percentage. The greatest gift I have learned from this process, is how easily the mind can wander from the center and create distance from daily goals. The real enemy of success is distraction. When our minds are focused, a Grand Slam Home Run is truly possible. A scorecard can give us a good “up to the minute” evaluation of our performance.

My scorecard rates the hours between 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. which is the most productive time. Roughly 12 hours, where each hour is given a score, and when divided by 12 gives me an average, which is the score for the day. Some days are better than others, but one thing is for sure, I do know what is going on in my life and how it is affecting me. Over time one starts to see a correlation between the performance on the scorecard and the level of success. For me, the scorecard has let me see that time is not the enemy if we use it wisely. Perhaps when we see our lives on paper our vision becomes clearer.

Tip the scales,
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2003 Jennifer Avalon

So many of us watch daily the comings and goings of our favorite Soap Operas. How seriously do some take this fetish? Quite a few who work during the day video tape their favorite shows so that they can view them in the evenings when they get home. A friend of mine never misses an episode of “All My Children,” even though she watches it at around 10PM, many hours after it has aired. Soap Operas…a little touch of creative writing, with characters who sometimes can feel like next door neighbors.

In the Soap Opera genre, we watch the comings and goings of other people’s lives….but really, how far off can they be from our own lives? Humorously, don’t we also live our own personal Soap Opera daily?? Couldn’t we all fill up an hour of airtime based upon our experiences of the day? Our daily lives, a continuing story on the roller coaster of life, that can enter any climate at any given moment.

Think to yourself, don’t you too have your friends and acquaintances, and an appearance of a villain once in a while? Perhaps we too are writers of Soap Operas. Some record their Soap Opera in the form of a diary, so that they can read back over the years to see how the story has unfolded. Others do it through photo albums. Here’s an idea….how about someone in the family assigned the task of jotting down the lives of the members of the family for the week? Then, each week or month all get together to listen, laugh, and learn. Of course, we would try our best to not hurt anyone’s feelings…but, it’s a nice way to see how close to each other we really are. It could be called, “The Jones Family,” or “The Smith Family,”…..you get the idea. We all are characters in one Soap Opera or another. Our own, and other people’s. Many times we decide what role we play.

Strange, isn’t it….. we sometimes think someone else’s life is more interesting then our own……while all the while the classic story could be all around us.

The story continues…
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2003 Jennifer Avalon

I would like to expand a little on one of the questions that came up during my latest interview. I received a number of e-mails on the subject…and I was asked if I could expand upon it in one of the essays. The questions is: What do I think about the current state of the Music and Entertainment Industry, and how is it affecting me?

What is evolving now in the music business has far more repercussions on intellectual property in general. First, we have to go back and look at how we got here. For most of the past century, for a recording artist, movie actor or book writer to reach the masses, they had to sign a deal with one of the major conglomerates. Yes, there were independent companies, but overall, the major companies had the financial backing to enhance and grow a career in the Arts. Over the years in the business, for each wonderful tale, I have heard nine horror stories of how people were taken advantage of and just plain ripped off. While a few starlets were paraded in front of the cameras, behind the scenes many were paid little to nothing. Anyway, let me stick to what I know best….did you know that within the past ten years you could have had a number one record in America, and made zilch? Crazy, but true. How could that be, you may ask? Toni Braxton, the R&B singer, had to file for bankruptcy because she realized how little she was making after all the deductions were taken out of her percentage. The houses, the fancy cars, the beautiful clothes….in many cases are an illusion. Just like us, they can charge it too.

I’ve had the opportunity over the years to sign with two major labels…when I saw the contracts, they were nothing more than glorified documents of slavery. They wanted to own my songs, have me pay half of the making of videos, support myself on the road, provide my own individual health insurance, all for an advance of around $100,000…which, by the way, I had to use to record the album. I would not receive any royalty statements until the advance was paid back in full. After that, one-third of my royalties would be held in an account in case records were returned from stores (!) Now I ask you….would you buy a used car from that kind of dealership?:) So I went Independent. Aviator Records is a label I part own. They care about my music.

So now for the current state of affairs. The Record Industry, in their wisdom, has decided to sue the very same people that they depend upon for a living! Yes, I know…downloading songs for free is not the answer overall…but, to quote the George Harrison song Sue Me Sue You Blues, “You sue me, I sue you, swing your partners, we all get screwed.” What I would like to see is between five to ten music sites selling downloads at a REASONABLE price. As of now, songs are for sale at about $1.50 to $2.00 a download. Apple Computer’s i-Tunes is selling downloads for 99 cents. That seems more reasonable to me, but for now, it’s only available for Mac users (!)

Some wanted to know my thoughts, so there they are. What I have decided to do is to open an online store on my website where people can buy the entire CD’s for around $6.00 or $7.00 a CD (which includes shipping and handling) I would rather do it this way so I can pass along the savings to the people who matter…the music lover. The Avalon Store should be up and running this Fall.

Just like we are able to come and go freely to public libraries to access knowledge and information, so too, I believe, music should be made partially available for free, so a person can decide if they want to purchase an entire CD. Music stores do have listening booths, you might say…but, unfortunately, the artist has to pay an arm and a leg to have their CD in one. At the end of the day, I have become a big believer in shortening the distance between an artist and the fan.

Long Live Music,
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2003 Jennifer Avalon

I recently had an interesting conversation with a few friends of mine around a coffee table one morning. We were each contributing our personal thoughts of the day until the word ‘Love” came up. Instantaneously there was five seconds of silence. We soon discovered we all had our own unique relationship with Love.

Of the four people at the table, myself included, each of us had been enhanced and/or hurt by Love. Three of us shared our thoughts and stories past and present on how Love has affected our lives. Even though some of the experiences have been painful, we were mostly in agreement that through Love, our lives over time had been enriched. One person at the table had a totally opposite opinion on Love. This person whom I will call “Tim,” told us that he has benefited from limiting the amount of Love in his life. He had an unhappy childhood, few dating experiences, and never married. He also proudly commented that he didn’t even have a pet, because, “I wouldn’t know how to take care of it.” He added that “because of my limited exposure of emotional attachments in my life, I have decreased the level of lifetime discomfort.” So the rest of us looked at each other and said, “Okay Tim…let’s examine this a little more.” The following are some of the points that came up in our discussion:

1. The day you are born, you get your first taste of Love, hopefully from good, responsible parents. As some of us know, this may not always be the case.
2. Love is a double-edged sword. When it works, it is euphoria….when it doesn’t, the trauma can seem endless.
3. To Love is to accept Loss. Relationships can end, consensually, or suddenly through death.
4. What is a life without Love? An empty sphere where all you hear is the sound of your own voice.
5. It is better to have failed at Love, then to never have loved at all.
6. Life is meant to be shared.
7. Love + Age = Enlightenment.

So you get the gist…these are some of the thoughts that were raised during the conversation. Pros and Cons…on the topic of Love. One point that I found quite interesting is the question of Love and Loss. For each person that we choose to love, we do enter into a relationship where the possibility, and in some cases, the eventuality, of Loss is quite real. For example: Our parents. Generally, they pass on before us. We grow up with them, we share our thoughts and dreams with them, our joys and sorrows…until one day they leave us here. Now, perhaps we should ask ourselves this…as painful as the parting may be, would we erase all the memories? Did we learn, and what did we learn, from the experience? Yes, indeed…Love may end in Loss…but because of it, have we become more evolved and better human beings? Isn’t that what it’s all about?

So does it take Courage to Love? Under the circumstances, you bet. It’s always easier in life to make no choices, have no opinions, and limit Love. Like the baseball player who is in a batting slump, the Champions step forward to take another swing, while the Fearful walk away. When the Champions of Love swing and hit a Grand Slam Home Run, they will tell you, “There’s no other feeling like it.”

Step up to the plate,
love, Jennifer Avalon
© 2003 Jennifer Avalon