How we arrange our lives always comes down, in most cases, to what we consider most important. We assign, mentally, a number to each task in our lives. These are our priorities.
There are always reasons why we do one thing before another, and when we forget we look for excuses. It’s a funny thing about life…..the things we don’t really need seem to creep up to a level of importance….strange, isn’t it?? “I don’t have time for this…..that’s too hard for me…..I couldn’t afford it.” Holiday cards are a good example. Who do we place top of the list for cards for us to send? Who do we forget? perhaps because we don’t want to ask the question why? Priorities matter.
Work, Love, and Leisure all are involved with priorities. The amount of time that we spend on each eventually affect the outcome of our lives. All this can leave one with a sense of not having control over one’s life, while in reality how we arrange our priorities directly help us get a grip on what’s important.
I recently had a conversation with a friend that involved priorities. My friend is a sculptor. She makes incredible art pieces. All her family always remark to friends how wonderful and talented she is, but strangely, they never seem to buy one of her pieces. This had a sobering affect on my friend. First she thought perhaps they were not really as good as people said……but that couldn’t be true, she reasoned, because others had no problem purchasing them. Then one day she decided to call her sister and ask her flat out, “You always praise my work……yet you don’t support it.” Her sister responded, “I have to be honest…..I’m jealous of you. I have been most of my life.” My friend was speechless. It’s easy to say that she should have given away her art to members of her family, for free. That’s not the point…..her family has no problem going to the local mall and buying whatever they want. But, when it comes to supporting someone who is a family member, or perhaps a friend, then it has to be free, free, free. How did she resolve the situation? Simple…..each Christmas she hands a member of her family a piece of sculpture she made. Of course, at first she gets a blank stare that says, “Where’s the real gift?” But they’ve gotten used to it, and to her, they got the message. As always, priorities work best when they are reciprocated.
This kind of stuff happens all the time, but we stay silent, afraid to say how we really feel. Priorities are all around us…..are own, and of others. All it takes is for us to be honest with ourselves and not pretend, then lo and behold, life takes on a whole new meaning, and sometimes direction.
love, Jennifer Avalon
Â© 2001 Jennifer Avalon